CSTT
This is the Blog hosted by the Woppat that has (hopefully temporarily) become Therapy online for me. Hahahaha. Electronic Zoloft. Did I spell that right? So I am starting counseling on Wed. Wonder what they're gonna tell me. I know the lady there and she's really nice. Kinda old biddie type, but that might be the best. It's a she, which should be able to give me the woman's perspective. As if I wasn't in touch with my femininity enough already. I'm surrounded by a harem. Okay, anyway, enough of the roundabout attempts at humor and sarcasm. What they've told me (they means all my amateur therapists) is as follows: 1. I am a product of the Navy. This means I'm a person who is driven, realistic, multi-functional, organized, pro-active, worldly, resourceful, blah blah blah. Basically, I take this to mean I've been around the world too many times to be a normal, average schmo of 29 years. 2. I'm not emotional in my dealings with others. I am curt, responsive, direct, but particularly unemotional/lackluster/dispassionate when facing both good and bad issues. 3. I don't listen (REALLY listen) to the issues. 4. I can't make sense of 2+3. It does not = 5 5. I care too much to just give it up and take the easy way out, therefore I am still here, still screaming inside my own head, actually asking the people, who used to scream at me, for help. What does all this mean? Based on #1: I'm a retard, unable to function as a real person. Based on #2: I'm too busy to bother with road-signs, flowers and sunshine. Positive point being I'm not distracted by rain. (then why am I stopping to type all this?) Based on #3: I'm still here. Might be deaf and imagining all this. Wow. Based on #4: Opinions can't add. Based on #5: Why do I want to run? Who's to say I'm not just trapped here by income, children, logistics of all sorts? I'm being honest as I know how. Maybe this will all pay off. If not, I'm going to a hole in the base of a cliff with basic water and food supplies, power, a computer and access. There I will finish my stinkin' language in solitude and try to convince myself I am a society of one so my stinkin' language will be useful.Posted by Pooka on 08/04 at 05:15 PM